Dear ebuyer
Thank you for cancelling the RMA. It’s the most effort you’ve bothered to put into my return since I raised it.
I asked for your carrier to pick up the item on Thursday 29th November. I can only assume that they have not taken their thumbs out of their rear-ends long enough to drive here to pick it up. Manual gear changes are murder when one hand is wedged soundly, yet obviously so comfortably.
In your cancelling of the RMA, your implication is that it’s me at fault. Thank you. Do you treat all customers like this? However, you might notice that I added a note on 5th December asking if the part was going to be picked up. Did I hear anything from you? Did I? (The answer you’re looking for, by the way, is “no”).
Feel free to re-open the RMA, get the courier to actually do their job and take this broken piece of electronic tattery away ASAP. You could also ask them to bring a working one in return (after the boys in the lab have exhaustively examined the returned hardware to make sure I’m not fibbing to you. I picture the scene almost equivalent to one filmed by Stanley Kubrick at the beginning of “2001: A Space Odyssey”).
God knows what I would have had to do if I’d have wanted my money back, though lube is pretty cheap these days, hence I went for the easier option of a straight swap-out.
I look forward to your swift reply and prompt action. However, I should warn you that I’ve noticed a group of pigs checking the wind direction and putting on flying jackets. It can only be a matter of moments before they finally do it.
Yours, rantilly