maths for this week*

June 22, 2010

Courtesy of BigBlueSturge:

Cruel budget today = Deeply discontented country
Cruel budget today + Football win tomorrow = Mildly grumbly country
Cruel budget today + Football loss tomorrow = Riots

  • Does your country embarrass you as much as ours embarrasses us? Send a comment and we’ll organise a fight in the car park behind Asdas to find out which country is the most hopeless!

*Add 20% VAT from 1st January 2011.

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mccartney will be spinning in his grave

June 21, 2010

Further to my Twitter feed, I completed a song, entitled:

Intranet Writer
(Lenin and McCarthorse)

Dear Sir or Madam, I’ve erased my site
I need it back, It took me hours to write,
If the boss finds out, I’ll be out of here
And I need a job, and I want to be an intranet writer.

Although all talent’s absent, I have found a niche
Writing crappy copy, which I self-publish
But I clicked a button, now the whole lot’s gone
It’s an easy job, and I want to stay an intranet writer

Intranet writer (Intranet writer)

I get one hundred hits, and some days even more
From my friends in sales on the second floor
And I’ve told them when they should refresh the page
It’s a lovely life, when you’re falsifying intranet hit rates

All my writing’s stolen from a press release
Which I’ve hacked about just how I please
And my spelling’s wrong, and my grammar too
I’ve an easy job, cos I’m the only one with editor access

Intranet writer (Intranet writer)