question of the day 2

“Hello, a user would like access to XLS Viewer.”

“They have Excel.”

“They need access to XLS Viewer.”

“They have Excel.”

“Yes, but they’ve requested access to XLS Viewer…”

“OK, they can have it. But we have an updated version. it’s called Excel.”

“…”

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i mean, seriously…

CHAPTER 1

I’ve just spent two evenings battling with Windows 8. What an awful, awful operating system it is to support and repair.

THE END

cat-pricorn one

It's a cat-astrophe. Oh yes, I went there.

Here’s Sparecat enjoying one of his favourite 1970s conspiracy theory films, Capricorn One. Next stop, The China Syndrome.

gone but not forgotte

Holy crap, I’ve just noticed that Yorkies, those “it’s not for girls” branded cheap yet chunky chocolate bars of my youth now don’t have enough chunks on them to spell YORKIE across the bar.

Instead, we are diddled out of our rightful sixth chunk, and “Yorkie” is stamped in an embarrassingly shameful way across each bit.

Like nostalgia, chocolate is not what it used to be (it’s certainly more full of sugar, my teeth bloody hurt having eaten a bit).

today’s finest question

“The code you’ve written?”
“Yes?”
“If it doesn’t load when it’s meant to load, can you make it load?”

elementaryos freya

I was rather pleased to see that there’s an initial Beta release of the new version of elementaryOS.

My main suggestion is that you go and download it. You know, because it’s good and stuff.

Linkington: http://elementaryos.org/journal/freya-beta-1-available-for-developers-testers

XBOX Exclusive

• Lara Croft and the bit where she runs slowly away from a Tiger
• Lara Croft and the bit where she walks through a 3D bush
• Lara Croft and the bit where she walks through walls
• Lara Croft and the Small Rock She Can’t Jump Over
• Lara Croft and the Frame Rate Drop When There’s A Bad Guy Just Off Screen
• Lara Croft and the shooting bad guys whilst running away from them, even though the gamer isn’t aiming at them
• Lara Croft and the Stupid Control Method where It Looks Like You’re Reaching & Jumping For A Ledge 500ft Up But Really We’ll Just Let Her Fall To Her Death
• Lara Croft and the nearly kills herself deviating from the main course because she can see something shiny up on a ledge, but after 30 mins battling with clunky controls, it’s just a small feckin’ medipack or a worthless medallion to unlock a stupid outfit.
• Lara Croft and the Am I Controlling Her In This Bit Or Is It A Bit Where They Try And Explain The Story?