elementaryos freya

August 12, 2014

I was rather pleased to see that there’s an initial Beta release of the new version of elementaryOS.

My main suggestion is that you go and download it. You know, because it’s good and stuff.

Linkington: http://elementaryos.org/journal/freya-beta-1-available-for-developers-testers

ubuntu natty narwhal 11.04

March 7, 2011

Just installed the Alpha 3 version of the next generation of Canonical’s wonder OS.

And all I can say is they’ve got a bloody long way to go before I’ll let it near my computer.

What’s with the theme being ignored? Why does Gnome look like it did in Red Hat back in 2000? And the nasty glitchy shit on the dialogs and menus each time they’re opened? It’s like someone’s de-tuned a television. Still, at least it installed – on the second time of asking.

And the universal App Menu? Ahahahaha, do fuck off. I thought we’d seen the last of FULL SCREEN APPS after Windows 3 was launched.

damn you DOS… damn you!

November 25, 2010

How much do I hate you? How much?

blind like a fool

November 1, 2010

Public service announcement. Watch this video for Tallulah Rendall’s new single, Blind Like A Fool. She’s the aces.

Thank you.

Edit: More exciting than this is that Tallulah’s first album, Libellus, and her singles are available through the Ubuntu One Music Store. This makes me even happier.

never overcook a computer

July 12, 2010

I have a chum whose sole purpose in life is to do fucked up things to perfectly brilliant computer hardware I assemble for him.

His most recent exploit is to keep his PC running throughout the heatwave, burning DVDs. How jolly!

How not jolly to be woken at 6:20am on Saturday by a text message: “PC won’t switch on, left it overnight burning DVDs, call me when you get this msg.” Well, bollocks was I calling at 6:20am. In fact, bollocks was I calling until about 11am. After all, it had been the warmest night on record since recorded records began being recorded, and I needed some bloody sleep.

“Mate,” he said, when I’d decided to phone. “Mate, the pc had been fine all day…”

“All day?” I said. “You left it on all day on Friday?”

“It was fine all day on Thursday, it ran OK all night, then all day Friday…”


“…And then when I went to bed last night, I left it burning a DVD because it takes so long…


“…But when I cam downstairs this morning, the entire box was dead.”

“And you are surprised by this turn of events?”

“Well… yes! What can I do mate? I need my PC!”

So I gave a few basic hints and tips; was it the fuse in the plug? Was it just needing a rest? Was he being a pleb? The usual sort of thing. But no, it seems the computer-box is dead.

“I tell  you what, mate,” (the emphasis was lost), “I’ll build up a spare Ubuntu box and have it to you on Monday, how’s that?”

“That’ll be brilliant, thank you!” And he hung up. Well, it was a hot day on Saturday, and you don’t want to risk your phone overheating and going bang, do you?

So what you can do here is imagine a montage section (you can supply the music, suggestions welcome in the comments):

  • Me finding the parts for a spare computer, digging in boxes.
  • Assembling the parts.
  • Switching the machine on for the first time.
  • The screen lighting up.
  • A wry smile across my face.
  • Taking off my glasses and wiping my arm across my forehead whilst drinking from a mug of coffee.
  • Watching a progress bar slide along the screen.
  • Typing at a keyboard and somehow the text on the screen is projected across my face as I type.
  • Clicking a mouse.
  • Finally placing the top of the computer on and wiping it with a piece of rag before patting it lightly and sighing to myself.

And now we are at this evening. I have just returned from installing the beast. And a beast it is too. It’s a Pentium 3, 733Mhz with 512MB of memory and 32MB of PCI NVidia graphics power behind it. It’s running Ubuntu 10.04.

I figured that PC-Boiling-Chum would want his DVD burner (I really don’t understand why) so thought I’d just slot that in. It would also probably be worthwhile sliding in his PCI-to-USB card too. He has a worrying collection of, ahem, webcams scattered about his desk which he likes to have plugged in.

My only problem was forgetting that his DVD writer is a SATA-based product, although luckily I had also installed a PCI-to-SATA card in the knackered PC. But what would be the chances of Ubuntu working nicely with:

  1. A 10 year old PC
  2. A PCI-to-SATA card it hadn’t known about on install
  3. A SATA dvd burner plugged into the PCI-to-SATA card it hadn’t known about on install

Obviously, it coped magnificently. Having opened the computer up and filled its amazing little riser card full with a video card, some USB ports and a SATA card, it then proceeded to boot and load in no time at all, perfectly happy with all the hardware. Webcams included.

So there we go. Unbelievers, start believing. Install Ubuntu Linux and enjoy.

(And for those of you that think something must have gone wrong somewhere, well, you’re right. The wireless mouse needed some new batteries.)

yo! ubuntu!

April 29, 2010

It’s 1830 here in the UK on April 29th 2010.

Where the fuck is my new operating system?

[10 second-later] Edit: Oh, there it is.

the wepad

April 21, 2010

Apart from sounding like something middle-aged ladies have to wear when they want to laugh, cough, sit up, stretch for the last packet of Fybogel Orange on the shelf at Boots, or breathe, the WePad, to capitalise its name nicely, looks to be the choice gadget for the discerning technology user in 2010.

No surprises then, that it looks very much like that other thing which Apple launched recently. You remember, the computer they claimed was “magic”. However the abilities and specs of this machine prove that the iPad is made of big cheesy chunks of Far-East-built fail.

For a start, the WePad is widescreen. This is something that Apple appeared to think wasn’t a useful feature for a machine which was specifically built to help you consume media (read: buy stuff off Apple iVideoShop). For a second, it runs an actual magical hybrid of a Linux and Google’s Android. Or something. I don’t know. Dear god, it’s just a computer. There will be icons and a mouse and a keyboardy thing on the screen that will help you type.

I could go on, but the website for the Magical Mystery WeMachine is here. It’s a much nicer experience than reading my anti-Apple bile-filled prose. And Fifi will complain if I keep going on about how crap Apple actually are.

lucid lynx

March 9, 2010

I took some time this weekend and installed the next version of the Linux derivative Ubuntu, known to all the world as Lucid Lynx, in a Virtual Box window on my big boy computer. The full release isn’t due until the end of April 2010, but don’t let this stop you helping yourself to the Alpha releases and trying it for size.

Whilst the setup and install was a breeze on the Virtual Box, it failed rather spectacularly on a real computer. I’ll grant that it’s a fairly underpowered beast, but it’s a pretty standard set up, and has a nice Nvidia graphics card in it to help with keeping the speed up.

The main issue might be to do with the new ‘Plymouth’ startup mode which kicks the graphics card into action as soon as possible after the pc is switched on. After all, a lot of changes will be made to the base code of Lucid before it’s official launch date and there are bound to be problems with what basically amounts to unsupported, pre-release, don’t-run-this-even-if-your-life-depends-on-it software.

I will continue to tweak, but I have a fall back plan in case I have to wait until April. This month, Linux Format comes with eight distributions suitable for low-powered pcs.  Covered are the usual suspects, Damn Small Linux and Puppy Linux, but the round-up winner was Slitaz. Time to fire up another Virtual Box…

You know, sometimes I try to remember what having a life was like. But it’s too hard to think back so far…

m’linux desktop

August 15, 2008

Like a fine WINE (see what I did there?) my Fedora 9 experience gets better and better.

In the past 24 hours I have:

1. Updated my kernel, which in turn shafted my Nvidia drivers, oh yes.
2. Downloaded and installed the latest Nvidia drivers.
3. Sorted out the slight glitch with my xorg.conf file so when playing full-screen games they don’t sit in the middle of my two monitors.
4. Installed Tomb Raider: Anniversary. It works lovely-well. Good work WINE guys!

In all, I’m very pleased with Linux, there are a couple of things to iron out, but I’ll do it one day. It’s all good learning fun.

my hot new fedora desktop

May 14, 2008

Released yesterday, Fedora 9, codename Sulphur was immediately downloaded and tested on my pretty boggo standard desktop. Prepare for astounding proof that the Penguin is finally ready for everyone’s computing needs. Bill Gates will be shitting himself tonight when he realises what a piece of programming excellence and quality F9 actually is.


You will notice:

  • the stunning KDE4 desktop.
  • the widgets.
  • the instant recognition of all my hardware.
  • the inability to run as a “live” environment from a CD (you don’t seriously think I’ve given up hard-drive space for this, do you?)